12/22: WOD: 12 days of Christmas

[[ Top part is CF stuff. Bottom part is feels stuff ]]

♫ ♪ ♫ ♪ ♫

On the 1^st day of Christmas my trainer said to do, 1 rope climb to end your work out.

On the 2^nd day of Christmas my trainer said to do, 2 power snatches, and a rope climb to end your work out.

On the 3^rd day of Christmas my trainer said to do, 3 muscle ups, 2 power snatches, and a rope climb to end your work out.

♫ ♪ ♫ ♪ ♫

Yeah. I know, I went there. I even sang it in class :)

So, we use 1 weight for all bar work, and on the left is the 12 days RX, the right is my scaled version:

1 rope climb                                                                   10 ring rows
2 power snatches @ 85lb                                                2 power snatch @ 45lb
3 muscle ups (or equivalent through pull ups)               10 ring row
4 push press @ 85lb                                                       4 push press @ 45lb
5 toes to bar                                                                    5 hanging knee raise
6 wall ball @ 14lb                                                            6 wall ball @ 10lb
7 box jumps @ 20"                                                          7 box steps @ 20"
8 plate burpees @ 25lb                                                   8 plate burpees @ 10lb
9 kettle bell swings @ 35lb                                              9 kb swings @ 13lb
10 handstand push ups                                                 10 knee pushups
11 front squats @ 85lb                                                   11 front squat at 45lb
1 1200m run                                                                    1 1200m run

GOAL: in 70 minutes, complete all days. The format for this workout matches the song:

1 then

2, 1 then

3, 2, 1 then

4, 3, 2, 1 … and so on until all 12 days are complete

ACTUAL: In 70 minutes, completed 11 days + 800m

That translates to these totals:

• Ring Rows: 190
• Power Snatches: 20
• Push Presses: 32
• Hang Knee Raises: 35
• Wall Balls: 36
• Box Steps: 35
• Plate Burpees: 32
• KB Swings: 27
• Knee Pushups: 20
• Front Squats: 11
• 800M run

For me, I finished 11 days plus 800m run. I can't stop repeating this, because i'm truly am surprised that I did as much as I did. I mean, full on shocked. Obviously everyone else had it much harder than me, but I've learned that I don't compare myself to them, bc I'm me, and they are them. Now, about that run. As you can imagine, as out of shape as I am in, I was dead by that point. Well before that point, but whatever. I ran out the 200m, and when I turned around gasping for air, sucking on my inhaler, 2 of the girls in the class were running towards me. See, they finished minutes ago.

They came out to run with me so I wouldn’t be alone. They did all 12 fking days, and still ran with me. Guys, I wouldn’t have made it for 800m. Not without them. They pushed me to just keep moving. When I stopped, they helped me breathe, and then get back to moving. I just wanted to cry. I couldn’t, bc I was so sweaty that there was nothing left lol. But I really wanted to cry. I’m so thankful for them.

This is why I love CrossFit so much. No matter how embarrassed I feel, no matter how bad I’m doing, or how slow I am, the people there cheer me on and help me. Because of that, I do better.

You were warned.... feels:

So, the last couple weeks have been rough on me, emotionally. And the topper was the coworker’s words. Yo, it hit hard. **truth time** I have suffered with severe BDD for a very long time. I hate looking in the mirror. I HATE photos of me (yes, I admit that part of the reason I became a photographer was to have a legit reason to say “no, I don’t need to be in the pic, I’ll take it for you”). And most of all, I abhor myself.

I put on a good show – selfies, smiles, laughs, attempts to look pretty – but it really is just all a show. Now, I’ve gotten a little better as time has gone on because I’ve learned that there is more to life than how you look, more important things. All those assholes who control every single show, magazine, and movie that we look at aren’t always right about what this world considers beautiful, good, or worthy. I’ve gotten to the point where part of me does understand that, but I still suffer from depressive bouts.

However, since starting this, it’s been less severe – up until the coworker’s bs that is. Whatever. Anyway, this has been good for me. The encouragement to do things I couldn’t before, I dunno, it’s affecting me in such a wonderful way. Too many feels right now. But those chicks doing extra running to hang with me… it meant so much. And my friends who have my back, that means more than I can express.